Awwww....Freak Out!

Okay, here's tha question. What is the single occurrence that could possibly send a single mother in a new city with no friends or family on a Sunday afternoon around 4:30 into a total and complete panic attack? Anyone, anyone??? Okay, you over there in the corner......no, not the two guys named Mike and their two dogs Mike. Okay, you over there with the donkey.....yes, yes, you're right, it would be walking out to her car and it NOT STARTING!

Yes, I decide to get my lazy ass up, put clothes on, dress the child and drive to the grocery store. I get down to my car, get everyone buckled in and I put the key in the ignition and tha bitch goes.....rrrrrrrr. Right then, I freak tha hell out. Not physically freak out, but mentally freak my shit out. In my head I'm thinking what tha %&**@#^ shit ass crap I'm I supposed to do now!!!!!!

For a second, I think I quit breathing and temporarily passed out in the driver's seat. Without freaking the child out, I somehow get back upstairs and call the BF who is in a different city. He clearly did not see what the BIG problem was. By this time, I'm in full attack, I'm sweating, I feel like I'm gonna throw up and I start babbling algebraic equations. How could this be happening to me NOW on a freakin Sunday afternoon????? How tha shit ass crap am I gonna get to work tomorrow?????? How am I gonna get the freakin shit ass car to the shop??

After freakin tha hell out for about 22.3 minutes, I realize that I have roadside assistance on my cellphone. I AM A FREAKIN GENIUS. I call the roadside peeps and before I even hung the phone up, they are in front of my place ready to jump my bitch off. I couldn't believe it. I was gonna get to sleep tonight. I was gonna get to go to work in the morning. I was gonna be able to drive my bitch to tha shop.

Tell me again, why was I freaking out?

Butt Today...

I feel like complete butt today. My depression has kicked in overdrive and I just feel blah. My eyelids hurt, I feel nausea, I'm exhausted and my patients is next to none. It's the weekend of course which makes it ten times worse.

My daughter wants to ask me 1.5 billion questions every 30.6 seconds on a normal day. Especially when I want to be left alone. I made the announcement this last night that I did NOT want to be woken up under and circumstances on Saturday morning. I made it to 9:30 this morning when I was awaken this morning to the ever ending questions before my pretty blue eyes were even open. It started something like this as I'm peacefully sleeping on a Saturday morning:

Her: Momma, Momma, wake up. Are you awake yet? Her: I'm hungry. Me: Give me a second to wake up. Her: No, I'm hungry now. I want something to eat now. Me: Please let me wake up (as she is prying my eyelids open). Me: (as I'm walking to the toilet) What do you want to eat? Her: Can I have Chips? Me: You can't have chips for breakfast. What else do you want? Her: Gummies? Me: No, you cannot have Gummies. Her: How bout some cookies and milk. Milk is good for you... You see folks, this started out to be something it shouldn't have been. The child is 5 years old. She's been eating breakfast every Saturday morning for the past 5 years. Not a Saturday has EVER gone by where she has not eaten breakfast. I'm standing there giving her the "GLARE" and wondering why in the hell she thinks that this particular Saturday she's going to get to eat chips or candy for breakfast. I knew right then, this was going to be a long day full of me laying around in the bed and her watching Disney Channel while eating a bowl of Cherrios.

My Debut

Okay, okay...I've finally decided to sit down and start a blog. I've been rolling this idea around in my head for several months now and I've decided it is time. I guess I'm going to let the world in on how my mind works and how frantic it becomes some days. I'm not sure who will read my blog or if anyone will even care about my crazy stories of a mother, a career woman, a single parent, and a rap music loving freak.

Let me start by introducing everyone to River $ity Rydars. Yes, I know, you're all probably scratching your heads right now wondering why a 32 year old woman with a child and a profession is listening to River $ity Rydars. I do love rap/R&B music but I know one of the members of the "crew." He goes by "G". I used to know him as "Lil G" but I guess through the years he has since dropped the "Lil." I used to date a friend of "G's" from what seems like a hundred years ago. I used to watch "G" scribble on notebooks that he carried around, along with 20 other notebooks with scribble in them, in a backpack. We go out to the club and he had that backpack. We would see him at the mall and there was the backpack. Even after me and the friend broke up, I would still see "G" around town scribbling with the backpack.

I thought about "G" and his peeps through the years. I often wondered what came of all that scribbling. One day, I logged into my Myspace account and there he was. Older of course. Right there...with some of the peeps. I couldn't believe my eyes....or ears for that matter. I sat at my computer and listen to all of their tracks that I could download. I sat at my computer and smiled for a long time.

I am so proud of him for following his dream, for keeping all those notebooks with the scribble in them. I am so excited for him. He is pursuing what has meant the most to him for what seems like forever.

Hopefully, I will make it to one of his shows and I will get to stand in the front row to cheer him one. I will probably be the only 32 year old baby's momma in the crowd : )